RSS Feed

I Need a Man… **in my Diddy voice**

I Need a Man… **in my Diddy voice**

I’m lonely.

I stay in the house a lot, read and do my work.  I get good grades in school and I give 110% at work.  My sex life is casual, with frequent pockets of involuntary celibacy.

When my heart is broken, I throw myself into my studies and my work, I find a new project to work on, I smoke – all things to fill a void.

I want a man in my life but would I ever tell any man this detail?  Hell no. Who ever wanted to be the “thirsty bitch”?

But why should straight women be forced to pretend like they don’t need the love of a man other than their fathers?  Why am I less special if I want this type of attention?  What makes this desire desperate?

Have you heard the saying, “The best way to get a man to pay attention to you is to pay him no attention at all.”  If you agree/ disagree with this, say so in the comments.  I agree with it.  Although I don’t think it’s ok.  I have had a man tell me that he is the type that requires a lot of attention and really doesn’t get into women who don’t give him the amount of attention he likes.  (He is fine too, might I add.) With that being said, I am a strong believer that individuals have love languages, regardless of gender.  (The 5 Love Languages, G. Chapman)

So why are women put down for admitting that they need a man in their lives?  Doesn’t everybody need love?  What’s wrong with having a need when you’ve already came into yourself, your career, your spirituality and your womanhood?  And why are women sometimes the worst critics? … crab mentality, I think.

So in efforts be human, here’s my declarations:

1) I am lonely.  Shoot me.

2) I am unhappily single.

3) No, I am NOT desperate.  Loneliness does not equal desperation and I am still choosey about my partners.

4) I need a man in my life because I work hard as hell!  I’m in a place where I’m fulfilled in my career, my family and friends, my personal goals and my hobbies.  But that doesn’t mean that I’m fulfilled romantically.  Coming home to the comfort of love makes a huge difference in your stress level from day to day.  I also need to be squeezed, held and caressed sometimes.  I need human contact!

5) Lastly, I need to be taken care of and yes, it’s a need because I can only take care of myself to a certain degree; I can’t make love to myself, for example, or be in two places at one time.  It doesn’t hurt to be babied at times.  Sometimes I just want to be vulnerable and I want my man to give me refuge from the woes of this world.  Again, shoot me.


About Feminist Living

As a consumer, you have the right to choose products that are not integral components to ideologies and industries that go against your beliefs as a free person and protector of human rights. FeministLiving is the founder of, an online hub for the daily living needs of feminists across the globe. Living while feminist can be challenging when you are bombarded with war, poverty, violence in media, and the violence you encounter every single day. As colonized people we are in a special place to embrace our migrations and come together to support one another in our efforts to be free. is an online hub to help feminists purchase their daily feminist needs. Listen to empowering music from women who celebrate women; music that does not objectify us. See the art of feminist activists and grace your home with inspiration. Read feminist literature like romance and science fiction novelists, Gweneth Bolton, Iris Bolling and Ovtavia Butler and order online directly from the bookseller. Watch for Fashionable Freedom to learn where to find oppression free clothing, styled with liberty. Stay current with safe space blogs like The Crunk Feminists Collective and awesome cartoons about women of color such as The Mis-Adventures of Awkward Black Girl and Friends. Find a midwife for expecting mothers and a feminist-friendly place to worship… the possibilities are endless… Let us laugh together and share our stories. Let us look up and recognize the love and support we do have, here online with, a place where we can experience one another in one place. This is our space. Let us live, wholeheartedly and with blessed intentions. As each one of us changes the world around us everyday, help support this safe space to expand feminist-owned businesses, voices, media, activism and our everyday lives. Feminists are ALIVE and PRESENT. Help us find one another and share. 100% of our donations go directly to the Web Development Fund for to cover webpage design and development, making it possible for feminists to have global access to oppression-free products and our daily feminist living needs. DONATE NOW!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: